I once worked for a man who had the wrong idea of success. This person, who for legal reasons will remain nameless, was a decent person to work for but had the wrong idea of what real success it’s supposed to be. Now that I’m a little older, this comes to no surprise for me, because a lot of guys feel the same way about what success is supposed to be defined as in every man’s life. A lot of men have the mistake of thinking that real success means achieving the American dream.
To summarize what the American dream is real nice short and sweet, it is that you have to have everything that a man is supposed to have. Every man is supposed to have a large bank account balance, a real nice house, a hot wife who’s hundred pounds skinnier than you, a nice car, brand name clothes, fancy this and fancy that etc etc. There’s nothing necessarily wrong with having a nice looking wife, a nice house, plenty of money in your bank account, and a few toys here and there necessarily… Unless of course it is at the expense of others. We have a problem in our world today that when men foolishly desire to chase after the American dream they do so by being married to their jobs more than they are married to their wives and caring for the attention, affection, and interest of their children. There is a fine difference between being married to your job and being a good provider.
This man I once worked for, felt that real success was having the American dream come true in his life. And yet one day without doing it on purpose he exposed the foolishness of it to me. I was mopping the floor one morning and he talked to me about usual stuff ‘hey how’s it going’, ‘did you mop here and stock there?’, and random small talk to seem as though it wasn’t just business that he wanted to talk to me. After talking for a bit and since it was mid October at the time, I had asked him a question that was more offencive then I would have thought. ‘so what are your boys dressing up as this year for Halloween?’ for whatever reason this question seem to almost offend him, because he answered with a Gruff tone ‘oh I don’t know.’ and when I asked him what he meant that by that and what he would be doing on Halloween he replied,’I’m going to be too busy being a success.’
His reaction seem to him to me a few things. The first thing that it hinted was that he was triggered by the fact that I wasn’t thinking of my family in the same aspect as he was. Like I said before this is a man who felt that a real man is supposed to be a success by having a large bank account and achieving the American dream. And when I didn’t agree with him indirectly this offended him in that aspect alone. However gets a bit more deep than that. I feel that he was also subconsciously realizing that he was missing out on something valuable and wanted to deny that was as true as it really is, so in order to attempt to bury this subconscious feeling of guilt or remorse however you want to phrase it he wanted to make me an example. Make me an example by indirectly saying this is why you’re mopping the floors and this is why I own the company.
I’ll admit, it annoyed me a little bit when he responded that way to me and I couldn’t say anything to him after he had said what he said about being too busy being a success. Now, I feel sorry for him in the aspect that while he definitely makes more money than I do in that he owns a company and that I work somewhere else, God has given me a blessing that is far better than a large bank account. One thing I have learned from the Bible is that being a real success is that you run a good household. While my household is not perfect by any means, God has helped me in being a devoted father and husband caring for the needs of our home to the best of our ability. I bet if you were to survey an elementary school class in most areas of the country, and ask them this question for a bonus quiz question if they would rather have a dad who makes a lot of money but virtually spends no time with them at all or a dad who makes an average amount of money but is able to on a daily basis give them some sort of attention affection and care for their life, I believe very confidently that most kids would choose be.
Even though many children would be tempted by the Rich Dad in that the Rich Dad could get them an Xbox 1 or this and that, they wouldn’t want that if they could never ever see their dad and if that Dad would never give them any sort of wisdom or guidance in their lives. Granted there are some kids who don’t have a dad, and some kids who have a very poor excuse of a father, but I firmly believe based on both what the Bible says and from experience every child needs a good dad in their life and craves it deep down subconsciously. My household may not be perfect in any way shape or form a my life could always use a little bit of tweaking in different aspects of that as well, but one thing I don’t want the devil to say to any of you out right is that you’re not being a good enough father just because you’re not able to get your kids this or that. Real success is that you are there for your family, that you love them very much and your family knows it is real, that you are there to guide them and strengthen them, that although you’re not with them every single moment you’re with them when you are able and when it’s important, Etc.